Guide to Chicken Gizzards

by Prof. Erica Potter

Chicken Gizzards are a very usefull tool for divination.   You find them in the neck of a chicken.  To use them, you take one up to your bedroom, and throw them with all of your might against the wall.  They will break in 4 different ways.

1.  Completely shatter.
You will live a long life, but always seem tired.  To over come this, eat more oranges, and drink more tea.

2.  Break in half.
You will live a shorter life, but still fufill it.  You may loose a loved one, but let your heart heal, and prepare to love again.

3.  Break into three.
You will live to approx. 92, and have atleast 33 members of your family when you die. If you die unhappy, spend 333 years with your family as a ghost.

4.  Doesn't break.
You will live to exactly 124.  You will eather be exceedenly happy, or exceedenly sad.  99% are happy, but if you are one of the 1%, there is nothing you can do about it.